Live life out loud, don’t let resistance block what life wants gift you with. Be allowing not resisting. Consiser your disordered affections not your attachments. I think St. Thomas says tempeance is first in the hierarchy of virtues. I may be wrong about this, forgive me if I am but my point is that anybody can be temperate, only grace can give it love. Be temporate out of love. What in my lfe is really not loving?